House of Parlance Blog

I’m telling you that Wayne Newton’s face is more relevant now than it has ever been. And it will only gain in relevance as time goes on. Like money in the bank.

You may be thinking that Wayne Newton’s Face isn’t any more relevant than it has been in the past - like, say during the Grunge Era when he showed the world that the virtue and luster of a Vegas showtune was like a beacon of light across that amoral, drug-fuelled landscape of rock.

You can not dispute the healing power of Viva Las Vegas or that other song with the German name that Dean Martin would sing from time to time. It’s a direct link to our last golden age. The Rat Pack. Tap dancing Sammy and Ol’ Blue Eyes on the Hollywood Silver Screen. Who or what has the power to connect us to that distant time?

Wayne Newton’s Face, that’s who or what.

In this era of uncertainty & lewd cartoons, it was heartwarming to see him performing at the opening ceremony for the 2007 NBA All-Star game in Las Vegas, last night. He looked like a photo-shopped Everyman with instructions to sing. He stood on a glittering staircase surrounded by beautiful women in high-cut low-slung rhinestone dresses with peacock feather crowns and high heels. His hair was puffed a bit and brushed back, his skin had the smoothness of an airbrushed covergirl and his teeth were as white as winking stars.He reminded me of the Lion King.